Me, Watching Tennis

Me, Watching Tennis
Me, Watching Tennis

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Vina Del Mar (without the right Spanish typewriter to make the n and enye)

My favorite season has begun!!!!!

Clay court tennis, the red clay of South America and Europe, produces, in my opinion, the most fabulous matches. Now, this may have something to do with the fact that I really love the men who dominate on the surface. But many people love the clay court season, love the long rallies, the sliding, the dirtballers who dominate and play such a crafty, well thought out game. It's the surface where mindless ball bashing is not enough. And Mary Carillo loves the clay court seasons and I don't think she falls asleep every night dreaming of Spanish men in (Like me.)

So. Vina del Mar. I can't watch it, but I am reading all about it. And here are few things I will say.

Gaudio- you have mentioned you might retire. Dude, you won the French. You won a bunch of other titles, too. You should be very very proud. I, for one, will never be able to say- I won the French Open. You were amazing. You also strike me as completely nuts in a particularly Argentine way and I know this may sound nuts too- but I find your brand of nuttiness very attractive. Also, once I walkked by you out by the practice courts in Canada and I got so excited I felt like I would maybe faint or something. I was like- that's Gaudio! He won the French!

Coria- I like that you are setting the goal for this year at playing as many matches as you can. I'm a bit more worried about your loftier goal of reaching the top ten next year. Do you still have that gorgeous wife with you? You, too, have a particular kind of Argentine craziness, but for some reason, you take it like five steps further than anyone else on the tour. So, I don't find it as attractive for that five step further reason. I find your craziness slightly frightening and off-putting. That said, when you grabbed your crotch at Lleyton Hewitt, I freaked out in a good way. Damn! That was something! Sort of like when Ancic and Capdeville started pushing each other. (You see, I am a big hockey fan, too. And I like the fights in hockey, I admit it.) So, you have cajones, my friend. And I also worry about you because you are really much more "Indio" than any other of the Argentines on the tour and I know how prejudicial European-background South Americans can be.

Verdasco- Will you marry me? I love you.

Acasuso. Dude- I forgot to put you on my list of players I'd do it with! I think I'll put you on it. But, you need to change your socks more often. Last time I saw you in Canada, you looked as if you needed a bath and some clean socks and maybe clean other clothes. But you still were awesome. Go Chucho!!!

Juan Monaco- I didn't forget to put you on my list, you insanely hot thing. Damn.

Chela- I like you. I like that are tall and lanky, because I am. That's it for now.

Massu- I don't like you. You didn't sign my kids' balls when we saw you in Canada last summer. That is not nice. They are KIDS.

Gonzales- I think you are hot and I love the way you hit the ball. I don't like the way you get in the face of your opponents after you hit a winner. The whole walk toward the net, stare at them, and fist pump and scream AT them? Yuck. Fist pump AWAY from them, like Nadal. Much classier.

In my heart, I want Verdasco to win. But he won't. So in a smaller part of my heart, I want Chucho to win. If Ferrero were there, I would want him to win. Anyway, I jsut hope the Tennis Channel plays some of the final matches.
Yours Truly,

Monday, January 28, 2008

The Mens' Final, Australia, 2008

Novak Djokovic beat Tsonga. Another wrong prediction of mine. I will say that Tsong was feeling the pressure and did not play as freely as he did whilst kicking Nadal's butt in the semis. Tsonga has such wonderful charisma, but I felt sorry for the Serb, as he was really not getting any crowd support. The fact that he managed to win anyway speaks volumes. The commentators acted as if his lack of crowd support were his fault. It wasn't his fault. But he did show some irritation at the heckling and that is dangerous, although, I think, understandable. They were very obnoxious to him. Also- his ball bouncing? Who cares! Nadal takes a long time. Nadal also thought that Tsonga was "fast serving" him. I've seen Serena get pissed at Jankovic (although not at this tournament) for supposedly fast serving. Slow serving , fast serving - you must adjust to the pace of the server. Of course, within the guidelines of the ATP and WTA. But obviously there will be different paces for different people. Mr. Tom, an old friend, pointed out that Tsonga did not shake the umps hand. Is he right? Can anyone else confirm this? I must go rewatch. More on that later.

Regardless, Novak, Nole as he is nicknamed, deserved his win. He played fabulously. My husband pointed out to me that is really a Greek, as many of the Serbs are, an ancestor of a Greek that was chased up into the mountains centuries ago, for some reason, like stealing someone's goat or some other thing. And I LOVE the Greeks. I Love Greece- it is my favorite place in the world. Zakynthos in particular. So now that I understand that Novak is actually a Greek, I understand why he is so jolly, and jokey, and happy go luckish, like Ivanovic and Jankovic. They are all Greeks and therefore easygoing like the Greeks. And that's why they have that dark hair, too. And sort of swarthy skin. Jankovic has a bit of the Mongol in her (like my favorite player, Myskina, who I miss dearly) and that is very cool, too. Genghis Khan was all over their land and left his mark, too.
Yours Truly,

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Ladies' Australian Open Wrap-Up-CALL MICHAEL JOYCE YOUR COACH

Well, Ana Ivanovic handled herself a million times better than she did at the French final last year. The Ladies' Final was good tennis for the vast part of the match and the more experienced player, Maria Sharapova, deserved to win. Maria had a great tournament, her womp of Henin being the highlight.

But Maria -- I said this once and I will say it again- Call Michael Joyce Your Coach. The creepiest moment-besides when your father did the throat slash - is when you are giving your Championship speech, and you refer to your coach, but you CAN'T SAY HIS NAME. Because you are not allowed to refer to him as your coach? But you sort of do in your speech? And then you dedicate your win to his deceased mother? The whole thing reeks of your father's bad influence and of his thing where he calls himself the coach and Joyce your "hitting partner." Enough of this foolishness. You are old enough to vote, now start taking control of things in your camp, too. You need to treat other humans with more respect. A good tennis player you are, now work on being a good person. (This means not ignoring your opponents when they sprain their ankles - that Golovin moment was a disgrace. It was also a while ago, so I hope you've learned from that.)

I know a lot of peope will disagree with another thing that struck me with the Ladies, but here goes it: Serena and Venus need a new coach. I like Oracene. I'm sure she's a wonderful woman. But her daughters need something fresh in their tennis lives. Even if that means bringing their dad back. I will never forget how well he handled the point fiasco with Venus at Wimbledon. He had his bumps early on on their careers, but he matured into a serious class act. And I think- maybe I'm wrong -- that he was excellent for their tennis games. And maybe he's still involved outside of tournaments. Either way, I'd like to see them bring in other tennis people into their camp - not just trainers and agents.
Yours Truly,

Saturday, January 26, 2008

A List, In Order, Of The Professional Tennis Players With Whom I Would Sleep

Now, I've put a lot of thought into this list, but I do hold the right to make changes in the future. Because, who knows? I could change my mind. Also, some of these guys are tied for the place they hold in the line-up. But I won't elaborate on that right now. And another also, some of these guys who are tied in place could be, you know, together! While doing their duty.

David Nalbandian
Rafael Nadal
Carlos Moya
Feliciano Lopez
David Ferrer
Fernando Verdasco
Tommy Robredo
Marat Safin
Roger Federer
Tomas Berdych
Juan Monaco
Richard Gasquet
Gaston Gaudio
Fernando Gonzalez
Juan Carlos Ferrero
Mario Ancic
Juan Acasuso
Lapenti (added April, 2008)
James Blake
Andy Roddick (even though I don't like him, I think he's a brat, but I'd still give him a roll in the hay)
Karlovic (something about him moves me- and he has a stutter, which makes me want to comfort him)
Nicholas Almagro
Robby Ginepri
JF Tsonga

(Oops, my husband just walked in- I've lost my train of thought...I'll complete this later and hopefully comment on the Ladies' Final.)
Yours Truly,

Friday, January 25, 2008


Well, in straights, Federer goes down to Novak Djokovic. I'm in shock. For the first time in three years, I believe, Federer won't be in a Grand Slam Final.
I don't know what to say. I need some help here. Anyone have any ideas?
I will say this: if Novak and Tsonga play as well in the final as they did in the semis, it will be an awesome, high level match.

I am interested in all the "end of the era" discussion. Not sure what to think. I did predict, very incorrectly, that this would be Rog's year of the Grand Slam. But he can still have a great year. I do like to see the new young guns come up. I loved when Federer beat Sampras. That said, I always feel for the loser. How can you not?

Fed is talking right now in the press conference and I'm feeling lots of respect for him. He takes responsibility for his loss. He gives credit to the other player. I need to hear that, I do. It's how I then respect the player, if they can show respect. I do agreee with Fed that he didn't come up with the passing shots like he usually does. Also, when he says, "listen, I've only had fifteen minutes to reflect", he's putting off the obnoxious journalists, which I like. So often, I cringe at these press conferences.

I am rewatching the match. My husband thinks I haven't seen it. I am doing my best poker face. but rewatching the first set is interesting. I feel the break back from Nole came fast. I didn't get it. But now at set point, what I see is- Nole coming in and hitting hard in the corners.
Yours Truly,

Thursday, January 24, 2008


I love Nadal. But what's not to love about Tsonga. His performance makes me think of how Gonzalez played in Australia last year. Just ON FIRE! Poor Rafa, though. I would loooove to comfort him, but I gather he has other people comforting him. And to get to the semis - its the first time on a hard court during a Grand Slam-is good.
Yours Truly,

Danny Hanny Goes Down

Wah! I stayed up until 2am to watch her lose? I like Ivanovic just fine but I wanted Danny Hanny to get to a final. She won the first set 6.0 and then loses? I hope she can move on and realize that getting to the semis is fantastic and losing to the formidable Invanovic is no shame. But still! After bagelling her in the first set! I hope she can get over that. I hope she has good people around her and I think she does.
Hey, Danny, if you need a pep talk, you can always contact me. I'm your fan, even if you can be "mentally fragile". In fact, that is what I like about you. You're a human being.
Yours Truly,

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Jankovic Did The Right Thing

She felt not so great. But Jelena played it out. That is what should be done. No retiring! None of that. Play it out. That's what Snezana's (I talked about her name already, bad name, but hey, she gave her daughter a much better name) daughter did. Played it out. And Sharapova played well. And her sort of nasty father managed to not mis-behave himself. And so it is. But what sticks out is Jelena's great sportmanship, her ability to play when she KNEW she was going to lose. That, my friends, takes character.
Yours Truly,


I'm STILL reeling about Henin getting bageled. What the?

The Williams sisters started out looking healthy, but as the tournament progressed, they started looking a bit injured. Hmm.

I will say this: Venus, when shaking Ana's hand, smiled and that is not an easy thing to do in defeat. I was impressed. I LUV good sportsmanship. Love it. Venus- you showed some grace there. It makes me like you even more.

Here's a question. Anyone watching this on ESPN think that Killer Cahill actually is a bit excited to see the Williams go down? He's got good manners, he really does, but I get a feeling he likes the young Serbs. That's cool. I'm OK with that.

I'm thrilled that, as well call her, Danny Hanny, is mentally fit. Great win for her. And Danny Hanny and Ana Ivanovic will definitely be the battle my husband looks forward to the most. He's a pervert. I'm sure he wishes they'd be playing naked. In fact, while he watches it, I'm sure he'll be imagining them naked, even though they will not be naked. Sigh. What can I do? I can't go inside of his brain and make him not think that. Such is life.

Yours Truly,

Two Prominent and Very Wierd Names This Week at the Australian Open

Dragana and Snezana, the mothers of Jelena Jankovic and Ana Ivanovic, have the strangest first names going this week. Dragana brings to mind The Munster family- and Serbia isn't so far from Transylvania, right?- and Snezana has the unfortunate power to bring to mind bodily fluid, in particular, mucous.
That said, both these fine ladies gave their fabulous daughters nice names, not to mention good athletic genes and hard work ethics. Go ladies! Even if you have wierd names, you are awesome.
Yours Truly,

Catching Up On Tennis

Well, I have a great tan ( I know how uncool that is, but winter here is bleak) and had a great time in Puerto Rico- and now I get to watch tons of DVRed tennis!

Here are some quick reactions:
Nalbandian- you broke my heart.
Serena- I think youl just got outplayed. These things happen. It doesn't mean you won't win the French.
Sharapova- what the F? You kicked Henin's ass! You SERVED HER BREAKFAST! BUT! And this is a big BUT- Stop calling Michael Joyce your hitting partner. Call him your coach. Because it makes you seem like an evil shit not giving him proper credit, OK? And get your father a new jacket.
More to Come!
Yours Truly,

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Bad Manners

I am not happy with Chris Fowler, Jimmy Connors and even Patrick talking so harshly about Berrer. Why doe meanness have to come into this? Johnny Mac never does this belittling stuff. Nieither is Killer Cahill. It is unpleasant. I feel for Berrer. Why can't there be a little compassion? Chris Fowler reminds me of a high school girl who's only way to feel good about herself is to make fun of the ugly fat girl. That's right, Chris. I'm calling you a girl.

More Notes on Tennis

Yuan played well, Serena played better.

Go Mardy Fish! That said, I wish Robredo had won, cause I find him very very attractive.

Speaking of attractive, Lopez lost to Gasquet. If I were given a choice- comfort the sad Lopez or celebrate with Gasquet- well, it would be a hard choice. Now, Lopez is worship worthy and I have a special dispensation for him (in my marriage...I have a few.) And, well, I love Lopez, as in I scream like crazy when watching him play. And I said something to him once in a hotel in Canada. I didn't say "make love to me now or I'll die!". I just said, jueges bien. He said, gracias.

Now Gasquet, I have theories about. He may be a little green regarding the ladies. And Lopez is not. So if I chose to celebrate with Gasquet, I could maybe teach him a thing or two about the, uh, ladies. I have this theory because of seeing him at the hotel in Canada. He seemed - lonely. And very young.
Yours truly,

Davenport vs. Sharapova

Waaahhhh! That's all I can say.

The only sort of good thing about this match is they didn't show Yuri as much as usual. That guy bums me out. He's got this evil troll vibe.

Mostly, I'm sad about the Dav. I wish she didn't have to play Maria so early on. Give her some more matches, etc... before being so tested. Anyway, I hope to see her play at Wimbeldon and anywhere else she decides to play. I heart Lindsay.
Yours Truly,

Notes On All The Tennis I Watched Yesterday

Pepper spraying fans? The Chileans and the Greeks going at each other? And yet, this IS the happy slam. Just sometimes, a bit too much boozing goes on. Oh well.

"I think she has one more slam in her." This from Mary Carillo. I wish, Mary. I love the Dav.

Martina Navritlova again with the best commentary. During Henin's match against Poutchkova, she brought up forced errors. This is something that isn't talked about. The only time I've seen them recorded is in the South American circuit. And it makes understanding the match different. You have more balance and less "unforced errors" which has become a catch-all error thingy. Anyway, I loved her overall technical focus on the match.

That said, I feel she didn't pick up that Henin most likley was "practicing" stuff. You see this, no one admits to it too often, because I'm not so sure it's legal in terms of giving it your all. The most egregious case was Sharapova in a round robin a few years back. She had already made it into the semis, so she basically tried out all these new shots and then lost. Hmmm.

Isner and Karlovic in doubles! I can just envision the two approaching each other on that one: Let's both be wierdly tall together! Yeah! I really like both of those guys, by the way. Too bad they lost to the Argentines. Watching the handshake was fun.

Warburg and Tsonga. I saw Warburg up close in a challenger in Binghamton New York. He was a preening self important little-bit-of-a-shit. Anyway, tennis is stressful. But still - not my favorite. Go Tsonga!

Serra lost, of course. But I have to mention how much I love his bad teeth. I love bad teeth. I love hockey players and their bad teeth. My husband has really bad teeth.

Venus looked great out there. I like her clothing.

And Mary with the Deigo Hartfield comment. Mary, I have some news for you regarding Argentina. It is actually a very diverse country. It has more shrinks per capita than New York City. It has a big Jewish population. It has a big Italian population. It has people from Irish descent, German descent, Swiss, etc... Oh, and the name Nalbandian? That would be Armenian. And Gisela Dulko? That would be Check, or somewhere thereabouts. And they both are Argentines. So don't be so ignorant, Mary. OK?

Lastly! Spadea-Ain't-Afraid-IYA! I love this guy. Yes, he's crazy. But he's also a serious underdog and outcast - so I feel for him. What a great match! Coming back after being two sets down!

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Amy Frazier Retired! Nalbandian Kicks Ass and is Rude Because He Hates Australians! And Lots of Great Matches!!!!

Amy Frazier, one of my favorite ladies in the WTA, retired. Years ago, the Michigan native who had to wear so much sunblock- she's a redhead- said that when she retired, she wanted to be a Math Teacher. In a world of wannabe celebrities and moguls and power hungry people, the tennis pro who wants to retire and teach math to kids is just about the most wonderful, least predictable thing. Good luck, Amy, with whatever path you choose. It was a pleasure watching you play.

Nalbandian acted out. As everyone knows, I love Nalby so much it hurts. And I also love his generally speaking, good manners. But here is a man who HATES Australia. I can't think of one Argentine who likes Hewitt- lots of trash talking there. Not to mention the time that Coria grabbed his crotch at Hewitt and then when Hewitt protested, acted out rubbing his thigh to the chair! I have never, ever seen anything so funny and outrageous. Now, Nalby wasn't playing Hewitt, but he was playing an Australian, in Australia. Which he relishes. What is up with Patrick MacEnroe saying that indoor hardcourts are Nalbandian's best surface? Anyone remember Nalbandian beating Hewitt on GRASS in STRAIGHTS in Australia during Davis Cup a couple of years back? Yeah, PMac, that's right. Nalbandian's best surface is wherever he happens to be playing. He's as all-surface a player as Federer.

I'm so pissed Moya lost to Koubek and I'm half Austrian! But I LOVE Moya. My heart is broken. Not to mention that it totally screws up my raquet bracket. I'm not doing well, folks.

But I did get Verdasco's win right! Go Fernando. I just posted the news on my Fernando Verdasco Facebook Group. Come join!

I loved watching the first two sets of Nadal and Troicki. But why were the announcers pronouncing it "Troiski"? Am I missing something here? There's no S, right? However you pronounce his name, he has such great game, great attitude and great courage in his first Grand Slam match. I was MOVED to see this kid handle the pressure so well. Big Hug Troicki!

I should mention that seeing the "Dav" (Davenport) struggle against the Italian was a little stressful for me- I want Lindsay to do well. But- Wow- such great rallies! Now, the Dav, as mentioned by someone - Mary Jo? (who I like) - likes qicker points. She's a big lady and the big ladies and not known as grinders. But, she moved fairly well! And she dug it out! Go Dav!!!

You've heard my complaint about PMac- I just htink he's wrong about Nalby- but I am not going to bother to talk about Chris Fowler too much. The man is sucha sour puss. Thank goodness for the Aussie Cahill. I am spending my DAY with these people. And Carillo and Fowler at times really rub me the wrong way. They are so - "nasty journalisty". It makes you wonder when was the last time they got righteously laid. Sometimes, poeple need a good screw to make them less hostile. Anyway, just a theory.
Yours Truly,

Monday, January 14, 2008

The Australian Open Starts!

Woo Hoo! Lots of tennis. SO much tennis that I can't even write right now! Hours and hours of tennis! This is why tennis is better than football or hockey. It is a sport that can occupy ten hours a day for days at the beginning of a slam. I can think of no other sport that offers so much mind-numbing amounts of couch potatoing.

Jancovic vs. Paszek was the best battle yet. Ugly tennis, but what a fight! And as ugly as the tennis was, both ladies hit groundies like I do in my dreams. But Jancovic may not go far in the tournament. She doesn't look like she's in the best shape. Slightly injured? Overworked? Burn-out? Too bad- I love her game. And being half Austrian, I'm happy to see Paszek do well. I saw her play in teh US Open junior finals last year and she was great. A real fighter.

Off to watch more tennis.
Yours Truly,

Guccione Goes Down to Tursunov

Not a surprise. Tursunov can play amazingly well. Remember his win over Roddick during the Davis Cup a year or two ago? But I felt for Guccione and I felt for Australia. It was a disappointment for the crowd. Still- two very close sets and some unbelievable serving.
Yours Truly,

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Kuzy vs. Henin- The Sydney Ladies' Final

I'm more or less skipping past the semis, straight to the great final between the "Kuzerator" and Henin. But first- Kuzy beating Vaidisova confused me. After Vaidisova playing so fantastically to beat Jankovic, I was just confused about her going down somewhat routinely to the Kuz.

But the final was a different thing. Kuz played so well and really could have beat Henin. I wanted her to beat Henin. Fifteen wins- now sixteen, that Henin has over the Kuz! Kuz seemed so focused, so ready to get a win. It was a great match. Two people who respect each other and play so fiercely againt each other. I hope we see that sort of sportsmanship at the Aussie Open. But I was disappointed that Henin beat her. So close! So close! It was a matter of a few points and a slight- to me, psychological -- edge that Henin had in this match.

Here are things that I like about Kuz: Like Chakky, she has the voice of a man. This makes me giggle. Combine her manly voice with her sort of teenage, silly, girly, playful behavior at times and it makes for an interesting character. Now, she's all business on the court, I know. But off court, she still retains a youthfulness that is refreshing. And her Fila look is so fitting! The Fila headband over her dyed blond shag? I love it! How someone so stout and so not really "feminine" (cliche, cliche) can have such great Borg-like style is wonderful to behold.

Off to watch my taped mens' final from Sydney.
Yours Truly,

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Henin's Boobs, Vaidisova the Beast, Jankovic's Forehead and More!

I watched the Ladies' quarterfinals in Sydney yesterday. And I thought I would write about something I've been meaning to write about: Henin's Boobs. I am not a Henin hater, although I briefly hated her when she did that put-her-hand-up-and-not-say-anything-to-the chair thing at the French, whilst playing Serena. And then I hated her again when she retired in the Australian Final against Mauresmo. But now I don't hate her. I have found it in my heart to forgive her. Why, I don't exactly know, but it is probably somewhat related to my understanding of a lot of suspect behavior from many of the women on tour: they are in their twenties. I, once, not so long ago, was in my twenties. And I was an idiot. But back to Henin's boobs.

No one- I repeat - no one on the women's tour straps down their boobs as tightly as Henin. Flappers in the 1920s didn't strap their boobs down that tight. Women who want to be men and take hormones and call themselves Bill don't strap their boobs down that tight. Damn! And, she straps them low on herbody, like underneath her ribcage. This is not where most people like their boobs. Most people like their boobs high on their body. High equals perky. Strapped low down like that is a bit- veternarian? I interpret this mostly as such: She absolutely doesn't care at all what the hell she looks like on the court. And this is brave, focused, a bit too intense, maybe, and- well indicative of what she does care about- winning tennis matches. Now, that cute little yellow bow on the back of her skirt may prove she does have a little fashion in her. But it is not a big thing for her and I like that about her. I also like ladies who like the fashion- Golovin comes to mind- I love her French fashiony vibe.

But Henin kicked Kanepi's butt. No surprise there.

Then came Vaidisova vs. Jankovic. This was a great great match. These are both two "testy" as Corina, the announcer with Barry (who I love to death) said, women. I loved watching this match, watching the amazing rallys, he serving, the desire to win in both these women. One thing I wanted to say to Corina after she said "I don't feel for her" or something like that, regarding Jankovic, is- Didn't you see Hopman Cup? Huh, Corina? Jankovic does have something wrong with her leg. Yeah, she didn't call a trainer but she couldn't play singles at all a week ago. Oh, I don't know. I like Corina, but that doesn't mean she is always right. But back to the actual match. A Check girl vs. A Serb. It's sort of like when Philly plays the Giants- the closer the countries, the closer the teams, the more intense the rivalry. Anyway, the bigger Beast one. Vaidisova is someone I would not want to run into in a dark alley. The girl scares me. She's HUGE seeming. And Jankovic is no slouch. One thing she has on common with the fierce Henin is her tennis-before-fashion thing. Her hair, like Henin's boobs, is pulled back so tight! It looks like it might hurt, her hair is so tightly pulled back. I feel her forehead may have grown over the past year due to her hair being pulled back so tightly. And I've seen really cute pictures of Jankovic, with her hair arranged nicely around her face. But give her credit- whilst playing tennis, she forgoes cute.

Anyway- yeah tennis! Tennis is back! I'm going downstairs right now to watch the semis.
Yours Truly,

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Hopman Cup Final

The US won. The mens' match between Djokovic and Fish, was exciting and close. But the fact that Jancovic could not play singles due to injury and didn't look so great in the doubles made for a less exciting final than it could have been. And yet, it is so fun to see a mixed doubles match figure so prominently in a tournament. It's this whole other tension, the gender thing. Women love to ace the men, men can't stand getting aced by the women. You have to wonder if it's difficult for the men to go all out and play as hard as they can- and really, they do, but it's a tiny question in the head. To watch Serena and Djokovic go at each other was exciting.

I'm getting super excited about the Australian Open. I'm going to watch so much tennis my mind will turn to mush.
Yours Truly,

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Hopman Cup Semifinal, US vs. Australia

I sometimes feel the great need to comment on the commentators. And it must be said that Martina Navratilova is fabulous. "I dislexed that," she said, laughing. Not only does she have a sense of humor about her own issues, she's usually spot on about the tennis. Personally, I think she is on the "spectrum", or has a bit of Asperger's, as they say around here and I love that about her. And all the Australian guys commentating? They are so damn HAPPY. There is no jadedness. I love it. I love this event. But where is Angus Young? Where is his brother Malcolm? I know they are in that audience or somewhere nearby and I wish the cameras would give us a glimpse of them. And I wish Angus would wear that cute schooboy uniform. (Did you all know that a few years back Federer listed AC/DC as his favorite band? It was on the ATP site or in some article.)

Serena looks so healthy and is hitting the ball so well. Bravo. I like Molik a lot, too, and have been very confused about her extremely difficult time coming back from an inner ear infection. I know an inner ear infection is a big deal, but - over a year for recovery? It seems a bit odd. But what do I know. I am happy to see her playing fairly well. I love her Aussie personality. And Martina was spot on in complaining about her return of the return. Work on that Alicia!

Mardy vs. Peter is another thing. Mardy's hair is almost in his face, he hasn't shaved in a week and he has a tummy. I all but expected him to chew tobacco, like he did on the bench at the Davis Cup, during his match. There is something slightly disrespectful about him. I'm sure he's a great guy- a stand up guy. Actually, I'm not sure about that at all, but what I mean is - I don't know him! But his arrogant slovenliness rubs me a bit. Just a bit. He played very well, of course. Bravo.

Peter, on the other hand, breaks my heart. For all you people who've read other of my entries here, you will notice a theme of mine: I like underdogs. I like Eastern Europeans who work their ass off and don't take their fortunate position of a professional athlete for granted. (I also like Spaniards and Argentines for personal reasons -- I lived there --and for professional reasons- they are some of the world's best (male) tennis players. Oh, and they are HOT. ) It breaks my heart. I know, I know, Peter is Australian. But he's really Polish. The impeccable dress. The serious face. To lose in two tiebreaks! Well, at least he has that lovely girlfriend to comfort him.

I'm running my tivoed dead rubber of the mixed doubles right now. Dead rubbers bore me a bit. I can't wait to get to the final!
Yours Truly,

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

A Dream about Federer and Perhaps, a Premonition

Two nights ago, I had a dream about Roger Federer. In the dream, I was at a hotel with my parents and my husband and Mirka. We were all sitting at this lovely table, one of those high tables that have cushiony barstools around it, a bar table, where food is often eaten, too. I was sitting with them, but I was a little anxious. I had to go meet Roger, but I knew Mirka wouldn't like that. It was this unsaid energy between us. I can't say if for certain they were broken up, but it was this tense vibe thing. Otherwise, the mood at the table was great. The lighting was soft, there were glasses on the table, music was playing, laughter sounded, but not too loudly. I couldn't wait any longer. I excused myself.

Excitedly, I went to where I was supposed to meet Roger, which was in the lobby/TV room. I had made him wait for me for some time and I was feeling anxious and a bit ashamed. I hate making people wait and rarely do (but hey, it's a dream.) And I come into the TV room and there is Roger, sitting by himself on this long bench-like couch. Other people were in the room, minding their own business.

"Hi Roger," I say and he looked at me while I approached.

He looked a little impatient, but who could blame him. I went to sit down next to him, feeling all sorts of things; excitement, because hey, even though I mostly lust after the Spanish and the Argentine, Roger's hot, and worry about Mirka hating my guts, and stuff like that. (Oddly, there were no emotions of worry regarding my husband. Go figure.)

And then I woke up. It wasn't quite light out and I was only half awake. I was sleeping in my favorite bed, in the country side of upstate New York. I thought, Roger wouldn't be alone waiting for me. He'd have been mobbed by other people! He's famous. And that's when I realized it was a dream. In other words, it took a second for me to realize it was just a dream.

I like dreams. I like the idea that they mean something, like Freud and Jung thought. I think this dream means that Roger is going to have a grand slam this year. I think that because once I had a dream that Kurt Cobain kissed me- it was so real, so sweet. I was living on Mulberry street at the time. I woke up and said to my boyfriend, I had a dream that Kurt Cobain kissed me. And then when we left the apartment that morning, we discovered that he had blown his brains out. Kurt Cobain had kissed me good-by. And that is why I think that Roger is going to win the Grand Slam.
Yours Truly,

I Was Wrong About the Tennis Channel! They Are Showing Hopman Cup!

I was wrong about the Tennis Channel! Thank you, thank you, anonymous person, for telling me about this. But I am still so upset I missed everything. How is it that I couldn't find it on my Tivo listings??! I still can't. I feel-bereft. A little hopeless. It will pass.

I can't say anything, because I haven't watched anything yet. I saw all the scores on Cfraig Hickman's blog and I'm not a big fan of watching stuff of which I know the result. Sigh.

Yours Truly,

The Tennis Channel Is Not Showing Hopman Cup This Year!

Well, my heart is broken. The Tennis Channel is not showing the Hopman Cup, one of my favorite events because of the emphasis on mixed doubles, the fact that it often showcases lesser known players and that it takes place in Perth, the hometown of AC/DC!!! AND- I will go on, there are so many reasons to love this event--is it Lucy Hopman? I think it is -- a woman pushing ninety years old, is always there, in honor of her husband who is the founder of the event. She flies to Perth from Arizona or California. Every year. And she's not young, people! What dedication. I have never flown to Australia - I will someday- but to do it every year? That is a serious undertaking. The woman is special.

I feel like calling the people at the Tennis Channel and crying into the phone. Also, last year they showed a bit of the women's warm-up, a bit of Adelaide and Sydney, too. And I fear they plan on skipping all of that this year.

Sad, sad, sad. Oh well, I'll go and read about it all on Craig Hickman's blog at-

Yours Truly and Disappointedly,